• Julian S. Miles

There's still time to reach your goals!

Updated: Jun 18


At the beginning of the year when I had the Vision Board Party, I definitely didn’t expect to have picked up all the things that I have since then. I didn’t expect managing my mental health, still in the middle of a pandemic & trying to learn and own my own self worth—outside of being a mother. I knew that in order to be the person that I wanted to be, there would be work, but I didn't know that there was so much more work to be done.

I thought to myself that surely the hardest days of life were gone....I was wrong and I expected just as much from the other women that attended. On Saturday we met up and mostly just talked. We talked about love, sex, children, careers and dreams. We did an exercise where we wrote down all of the things that had stopped us from doing what we set out do to in the beginning of the year. We metaphorically "carried" those things on us and talked about what we could do to let those things go. We took a walk by ourselves and just talked to God. We just asked him what he had to say to us and to help guide us as to what's next.

How do we show up in the middle of our grief for ourselves while trying to raise our children differently? How do we balance yesterday's pain and today's joy? How do we take care of ourselves while taking care of a family? How do we face our very real reality and still have hope for better days? I have discovered that the only way to do this is to figure it out.

We must be willing to see ourselves in a vulnerable state and in need of something that we must learn to give ourselves: Grace. In a world that promotes perfection and a right way and wrong way to do things, we must accept the nature of our lives and accept the challenge that comes along with being the first ones to evoke change.

We are all on a journey through life. This means that there are several stops, twists and turns that must be taken in order to get to our final destination. There are mountains and valleys to climb and we must be willing to persevere and believe in what we are doing and that it matters. We must also be willing to do the work. This year I realized that I struggle in the area of love. I realize that I have co-dependent tendencies and because of this, I find myself in the "rescuer" position often. I also found myself in situations that did not promote my self-worth. I had to go back inside of myself and begin to deal with the parts of myself that were no longer serving me. It has been hard and painful. and lonely. But I know who I am and I know what I deserve and I will not stop until my actions match what God says about me.

So, there's still time to show up the way that you want to. There is still time to begin the habits that will overall produce fruit in your life. One thing I have always known to be true is that God gives us a picture of who he wants us to be and we have to do the work to be prepared for it. If you are willing to show up, there is still time to "be" the version of yourself that you wanted to be in the beginning of the year.

I will leave you with these words. Don't give up on yourself. Allow the pain to bubble to the surface, and let it out. Read books, journal, hang with friends, find new friends, leave relationships that make you feel bad about yourself and don't be afraid to face the sides of yourself that are weak. It's literally only up from where you are!

God loves you and He will never change his mind about you!
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